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nagging

Four practical ways to deal with a nagging spouse

Nagging can be defined as an incessant complaint by a partner about someone’s habit or behavioral pattern in a relationship. It is a common cause of most broken relationships. It can start with a salient or hushed remark about simple issues like food, dress, or housekeeping. The question is: “How then can one handle a nagging spouse”?

Show love and understanding

The more love you shower upon your spouse who is always nagging, the less frequent the occurrence of nagging. It, however, takes more than an effort to display love where nagging goes to the extreme. Love is like a stream that quenches the flame ignited by nagging. Love can forgive any wrongdoing on your person, no matter how severe it is. Life can be difficult sometimes especially with families and kids coming in. Things may not go exactly as you planned, and this may result in nagging from either partner, but it is very important that love and understanding be shown.

Open channels of communications

The urge is always strong to avoid direct contact with a nagging wife or husband. When partners no longer talk to each other due to the problem of nagging, it can escalate the entire issue and blow it out of proportion.

I have often seen couples who avoid each other for a lengthy period because of this single problem and at the end of the day; it becomes extremely difficult to reconcile both parties due to the enormous damage that has been inflicted. The more open both partners are, the easier it is to handle this negative attribute which is capable of destroying relationships.

Appreciate any positive progress made

When a partner makes any positive progress in a given area, it is good that appreciation should be extended. When an individual knows his/her effort to create a positive change is being noticed, it will aid total transformation and eliminate negative barriers.

It is not enough to complain about things your partner has failed to do, but also to appreciate the little things he/she does. It may sound childish, but it thus works wonders.

Never retaliate

There is always the temptation to retaliate when the issue of nagging crops up, but it is important to avoid falling into such temptations. The process of nagging creates a hurting effect in an individual and the best way to handle it is not to retaliate because two wrongs cannot make a right. Retaliation is a sign of immaturity and a lack of forgiveness.





When death puts two lovebirds apart

When death puts two lovebirds apart

A Painful experience

Death of a loved one is one of the most painful experiences ever imagined. I could recall when I lost my Dad years back. It took me quite a while to recover from the pain and heartache. He loved me so dearly and always made sure I was happy.

What is even more touching is the sudden death of a spouse. Some find it so hard to deal with the trauma. More than 14 years ago, someone, I knew personally, died after a brief illness. He was so close to the wife. They were like Siamese twins.

The wife struggled to cope with the demise of her husband. Three weeks after the death of her best friend, she fell ill and died also. That’s how tough it is, dealing with the demise of a loved one.

I love poetry so much, and yesterday I saw a very emotional poem about the demise of a loved one. It is a touching tribute. Death indeed can create a vacuum that oftentimes, can never be filled.

If tomorrow starts without me

If tomorrow starts without me, and I’m not there to see. If the sun should rise and find your eyes All filled with tears for me. I wish so much you wouldn’t cry the way you did today. While thinking of the many things we didn’t get to say.

I know how much you love me, As much as I love you, and each time that you think of me, I know you’ll miss me too; But when tomorrow starts without me, Please try to understand, that an angel came and called my name, And took me by the hand.

And said my place was ready, in heaven far above, And that I’d have to leave behind all those I dearly love. But as I turned to walk away, A tear fell from my eye, For all my life, I’d always thought, I didn’t want to die.

I had so much to live for, So much left yet to do, it seemed almost impossible, that I was leaving you. I thought of all the yesterdays, the good ones and the bad, I thought of all that we had shared, and all the fun we had.

If I could relive yesterday, Just even for a while, I’d say good-bye and kiss you and maybe see you smile. But then I fully realized, that this could never be, for emptiness and memories, would take the place of me.

And when I thought of worldly things, I might miss come tomorrow, I thought of you, and when I did, my heart was filled with sorrow. But when I walked through heaven’s gates, I felt so much at home. When God looked down and smiled at me, From His great golden throne,

He said, “This is eternity and all I’ve promised you.” Today your life on earth is past, but here life starts anew. I promise no tomorrow, but today will always last, and since each day is the same way, there’s no longing for the past.

You have been so faithful, So trusting and so true. Though there were times you did some things, you knew you shouldn’t do. But you have been forgiven, and now, at last, you’re free. So won’t you come and take my hand, and share my life with me

So when tomorrow starts without me, don’t think we’re far apart, for every time you think of me, I’m right here, in your heart.”

Strength for the Journey

Death indeed separated two lovebirds and made what would have been a beautiful union end in tears. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, and though sometimes we are helpless, we do wish that we grow old with the one we love.

I once lost a very dear friend to the cold hand of death. I couldn’t believe he was gone until we all went to the morgue to see his corpse. It was an unforgettable experience. Death had dug a huge hollow in my heart.

Omoefe was always cheerful, kind, and gentle. Unfortunately, he fell ill and couldn’t recover. He was just 17. He was extremely talented and blessed with artistry gifts. Death ensured those gifts never so the light of the day.

To those who have lost a loved one, always take solace in the forever love that was shared. The beautiful memories will keep your heart glow and give you strength for the journey.

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