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Success means different things to different folks

Success is possible to those that believe

Success is one of the often searched words on the internet. A quick search on google and a search for the word “success” will bring up 245,000 search items. The reason why people search for success online is that they desire success. Unfortunately, desire alone is not enough guarantee for you to become successful in life.

Success takes time

Everything in life happens according to our time. Every individual has a specific time for certain things to be accomplished in life. You may look at your friends for example, and keep wondering about the rapid progress they have made in life.

The truth is that everything happens at their own pace. They have their own time and clock and you have yours, so be patient if you desire to become successful in life.

Don’t envy others making progress in life

Jack Ma started Alibaba at age 39. At that age, some of his friends were still struggling to make meaning out of life. Virgin Group was started by Richard Branson when he was 34. That would be considered, a major achievement.

These men achieved success, not because they were looking at their friends and colleagues, but because they intentionally desired success and worked hard towards achieving their goals in life. It all boils down to doing what gives you joy and happiness.

Be happy with little success

Celebrating the little achievements and never getting discouraged is the beginning. Everyone who becomes successful in life started from the very bottom. They never achieved their great accomplishments overnight.

When we are happy with the little success we achieve in life, it opens door to better opportunities. Clinching the bronze medal in the Olympics was a huge achievement for Weightlifter Christine Girard of Canada at the 2012 Summer Olympics in London.

Six years later, Christine became a Gold medalist when Maiya Maneza of Kazakhstan and Svetlana Tsarukaeva of Russia who won Gold and Silver were disqualified for taking banned substances. It may have taken years, but hard work surely pays a huge dividend.

Be consistent and success will show up

Consistency is always synonymous with those who achieve great things in life. No matter how slow the progress may seem, keep moving, and never stop trying. What you consistently pursue and desire will eventually become a reality.

It takes a strong commitment to not only your passion but also your personal life and family life to truly become successful.

Been imperfect can sometimes be perfect

Been imperfect can sometimes be perfect

We are imperfect beings created to flourish in our unique ways. So often in life, we want to create the perfect relationship, that perfect lifestyle, that perfect business model. Unfortunately, it may never end up the way we plan.

I have gone through the route of imperfection in my life’s journey. It was a journey that saw me striving to do things perfectly in the best possible way. It all ended up miserably, as the more I tried, the more I soon discovered the futility of the process.

How did I handle perfectionism

There were several steps I took when I realized the idea of perfectionism wasn’t helping me to be fulfilled in life. These steps have so far helped me to evolve into a better person than what I was yesterday

Accept your frailty

As humans, we have our unique strengths, and we also have our weaknesses. That is what makes us human. When I realized my weakness won’t make me live a perfect life, I had to accept my frailty and enjoy my imperfect state. This has helped me to gradually work on those areas that need to be improved upon.

The moment an individual fails to accepts his/her weakness, the ability to live a fulfilled life is drastically affected. We all make mistakes and these mistakes result from our imperfect states as humans. The first and most important step was accepting my weakness. It opened the door to my evolving into a better person and breaking free from the chain of perfectionism.

Work on your area of imperfection

While growing up, I was extremely shy. So shy that I had difficulty relating to the opposite sex. but when I accepted my frailty and imperfection, I started working on that major weakness.

It took years, but eventually, I evolved into a more confident and assured individual. It all started from the moment I accepted my frailty and the fact that chasing after perfectionism wasn’t doing me any good.

I joined the local choir in my church in a bid to improve my self-confidence and my phobia of imperfection. I also started attending some youth programs within Nigeria. These self-improvements and Information based classes created a platform for me to interact with other youths and also gave me the needed boost to become self-assured in my career pursuit.

It is not enough to accept your imperfection. Actively working to improve those areas where you need improvement is paramount. You don’t rejoice in been born into a poor family background. You work towards breaking the chain of poverty and liberating your generation yet unborn. I had to practically work on my imperfection.

Create room for tolerance

Another practical step I took in my bid to overcome perfectionism, was creating room for tolerance. In life, you will always come across different shades of people. The lazy, the hard-working, and even the perfectionist.

I have had my fair share of these, and when I created a mindset of tolerance from the onset, it enabled me to deal with the challenge of working with perfectionists. One thing you will notice about those who want to create an air of perfectionism around themselves is this: “They would tend to make all your effort or hard work seem inadequate”.

You can never please the perfectionist. They would always lookout for a fault in whatever you do. So the key was to create room for tolerance. Accept that you will encounter those who still believe in perfectionism. That room of tolerance you have created will enable you to deal with such a scenario when it arises. You don’t feel inadequate. You don’t feel insecure or victimized. You only learn valuable lessons from those who still cling to the dogma of perfectionism.

Improve daily

Though I don’t believe in perfectionism, I choose to improve on myself daily. This is a practical decision I started implementing more than a decade ago. I try to become a better version of myself. I don’t strive for perfection, because as humans, we can never be perfect.

There is always that element of condemning the efforts of others if we try to pretend or claim to be perfect because, in your eyes, you keep seeing the mistakes others make.

Improvement is both inward and outward. I strive daily to improve in areas where I know I am lacking. As a Content Writer, for example, I read books, watch videos on self-improvement, and try to implement these ideas in my daily life. Outwardly, I strive to improve my interpersonal relationship with others. Become more friendly, more helpful, and more accommodating.

It is a process, and just like a journey, been imperfect can sometimes be perfect, because it gives you room to be yourself and to learn daily. You don’t get to be too hard on yourself because you not perfect. These steps have made me appreciate life better and create sufficient room for those struggling to achieve their dreams and goals in life.

Ignore the haters

Ignore the haters

Someone once described haters as “people who whisper your success, but broadcast your failure”. They are always there no matter how you try to shake them off. Don’t even attempt to please them, because the more you do, the more they would keep hating on you.

Those who aren’t successful in life, don’t have issues with haters, because they are already down. The focus is always on those who aspire to achieve their dreams and goals in life. The more successful you are in life, the more the hate.

Eight years ago, when I bought my first call, not all my friends were happy with me. Some secretly envied me and with envy came hatred. It got worse when I started making real progress in my career.

How I dealt with haters

I focused on those who are happy to have me around and ignored the haters. This has worked quite well for me, because the more I ignore them, the quicker they disappeared. They realized that I wasn’t ready to take their hate seriously, and so they gave up hating on me.

Don’t get distracted

It is easier to get distracted when people say hurtful words about us. A young lady who was in an abusive relationship and had grown to hate herself shared her experience. “Each day was like hell on earth. I tried all I could to please him, but the more I did, the more he hated me. I felt I was not good enough. At a point, I had to break up with him, when the abuse was affecting me emotionally.

Those were the most difficult periods of my life. I became overweight, as I wasn’t watching my diet anymore. When I left Dave, I did all I could to gain back my confidence. It was a real struggle because I had almost lost everything. My self-worth was all gone. I had zero self-confidence and I was standing at the very edge of a mental breakdown.

Relocating to a new city and finding a new job gave me a fresh lease of life. It was like a heavy burden had been lifted off my fragile shoulder. For once I was getting my groove back and I loved it. The bad energy was all gone and I was able to make new friends.

Two years after, I fell in love with someone whom I refer to as my sunshine. He erased all the hate toxins that David had deposited in me. I realized that life always gives us a second chance to become who we truly want to become in life. Love triumphed over hate and I was the happiest soul that ever lived”

Never pay evil with evil

There is always the temptation to hate those who hate you. Unfortunately, that may not be the right approach. Like Martin Luther, King Jnr said: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that

We must always find a way to forgive those who hate without reason. Love them and always find a place in your heart to forgive them. Hopefully, they would see a reason to stop hating and start loving.

Get Inspired by hate

Some call them haters, but I would prefer to call them motivators. Let the actions of the few that hate you push you to greater heights. Keep using the stone of hate thrown at you, to build a platform that will inspire you towards your goals in life.

On the 14th of October 2019, Bulgaria hosted England in a Euro 2020 Qualifier. The match was almost marred with monkey chants each time England winger Raheem Sterling was on the ball. Raheem refused to allow racial abuse to weigh him down. It rather motivated him to put in his best performance in the color of England. He went ahead to score a brace, as England thumped Bulgaria 6-0.

Akinfenwa inspire Wycombe Wanderers to the Championship

Akinfenwa inspire Wycombe Wanderers to the Championship

Waiting for people to inspire you to chase your dreams is a waste of time. You got to inspire yourself to pursue your goals. There are moments in life, where it seems all hope is lost. When nothing seems to be working. Those are moments one needs to look inward and never give in to discouragement.

Four years ago (2016), people said he was finished. But he refused to give up on himself. The player who is ranked amongst the biggest in English football at 102 Kg has got a story to share. His name is Saheed Adebayo Akinfenwaand he is a professional footballer presently plying his trade with newly-promoted Wycombe Wanderers.
In 2016, the 38 years old striker jokingly said he was technically unemployed after been released by AFC Wimbledon. The widely traveled footballer who has played for 15 clubs, is known for his physical strength and heavily built frame.

Akinfenwa the Journeyman

Akinfenwa started his football journey in Lithuania with FK Atlantas but was unable to settle down due to racial abuse. He quickly returned to the UK after just two seasons with the Lithuanian club and joined Welsh top side, Barry Town.

His football journey has seen him then move from Boston United, Leyton Orient, Rushden & Diamonds, Doncaster Rovers, Torquay United, Swansea City, Millwall, Northampton Town, Gillingham, and AFC Wimbledon.

Against all odds

Looking at him with his massive frame, one might be tempted to believe he won’t make a success of his football career. Unfortunately, he has defied all odds and has had an illustrious career spanning more than 20 years. He has so far made a total of 717 appearances, scoring 26 goals and winning numerous trophies and personal awards. He has had to battle against racism, abuse, and all sorts of challenges. In their Play-off match against Fleetwood, he was called “Fat Water Buffalo”, but they went ahead to win against all odds.

From technically unemployed to the Championship.

In 2016, Akinfenwa spoke with reporters in a live interview that he was technically unemployed, as his contract was up at AFC Wimbledon.

Fast forward to 2019, and the London born footballer of Nigerian descent inspired Wycombe wanderers to a place in the Championship after defeating Oxford United 2-1 in the playoffs.

If there is anything that has kept him going, it is the belief in his abilities. He has seen the beautiful side of the game he loves so much. He has also experienced the bitter side of the football. Life and football are all about opinion. “Four years ago someone gave an opinion about me and that’s their opinion. My story shows the only opinion that matters is the opinion you have about yourself. I was lucky and blessed to find a manager and players who believed in me and so we are here today”.
At 38, he still has a lofty dream of helping Wycombe wanderers in their Championship quest in the coming season. Nothing is impossible when it comes to football. Akinfenwa can even inspire Wycombe Wanderers to book a place in the Premiership!

Seven Amazing Secrets Life Has Taught Me

Seven Amazing Secrets Life Has Taught Me

Life secrets are seen in the simple things of life. As I walked through the windy pathway of life, there are some hard lessons I have been forced to encounter directly or indirectly. These lessons have made me more mature, stronger, and better equipped to face the challenges of life. I am delighted to share them with readers, with the hope that it would be a source of encouragement and inspiration to those who are down.

Happiness is a decision

No matter what one goes through in life, always make up your mind to be happy. Happiness is a decision that starts from the inside and radiates outside. Never you give room for sorrow or sadness because life is too precious to be wasted. Life comes with sunshine and roses. It also comes with floods and pains. The most beautiful thing about life itself is the gift of life. Make a choice today to live a happy life and see how beautiful you’ll become.

There is no permanent friend

I have had the unique opportunity of meeting people I mistook to be friends. Shared all I had with them and in the end, all I got was betrayal and heartbreak. I have been made to learn this lesson the hard way because I took so many things for granted. Some individuals are friends who become friends based on interest. When things are rosy, they become so close. When things become rough, they enter into ghost mode and vanish into thin air.

Live each day at a time

One of the reasons why some individuals suffer from anxiety is the burden they carry on their lean shoulders. They keep thinking of what the future holds for them and add it to the problem of yesterday even when they are still struggling to make ends meet.

Life has taught me to live each day at a time, without worrying about what to eat, drink, or put on. Anxiety has not been known to have solved any problem. Live each day to the fullest and stop killing yourself with worry and anxiety.

Quality over quantity

When I got a hold of this wonderful secret earlier this year, the first thing I did was to cut off some unproductive friendship. These friends were not motivating me towards my goal in life, and I discovered that the more friends I had, the more complicated it was for me to achieve success in life.

The secret is in the quality of people you associate with, not the quantity. Two quality friends can help transform you from your present level into your dream life. Avoid mixing up with the crowd and identify quality friends who have similar goals and aspirations. This is the most precious secret I uncovered this year.

I can be anything that I set my mind to be

I have always loved writing and helping people achieve their dreams and aspiration. When I discovered these gifts were inside of me, the urge to work towards utilizing my full potential became apparent. Today, I am glad to announce that I have started seeing some of the fruits of my labor. I get emails and remarks about how positive my articles have blessed lives.  I’ve received messages that have left me in tears. It is like a dream come true.

I am exactly what I think I am

Whenever I am down, I daily confess positive affirmation to myself. Keep telling myself that I am a success not a failure. If I confess positive, my mindset will be programmed to accept positive thoughts and ideas. This will ultimately have a wonderful effect on my life. This is an ancient secret that can be positively or negatively activated. Your thoughts must be tuned to the right channel to receive positive ideas.

Don’t allow others to devalue you

You are too valuable and precious to be brushed aside. I cannot be intimidated by circumstances or individuals. The value I place on myself is what the world will appreciate and nobody can devalue or look down on me without my permission.

There is always a price tag attached to everything under the face of the earth. The price tag is determined by the owner of the product or goods. We must not allow anyone to take us for granted. You are priceless, inestimable in value, and beautiful!

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