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Been imperfect can sometimes be perfect

Been imperfect can sometimes be perfect

We are imperfect beings created to flourish in our unique ways. So often in life, we want to create the perfect relationship, that perfect lifestyle, that perfect business model. Unfortunately, it may never end up the way we plan.

I have gone through the route of imperfection in my life’s journey. It was a journey that saw me striving to do things perfectly in the best possible way. It all ended up miserably, as the more I tried, the more I soon discovered the futility of the process.

How did I handle perfectionism

There were several steps I took when I realized the idea of perfectionism wasn’t helping me to be fulfilled in life. These steps have so far helped me to evolve into a better person than what I was yesterday

Accept your frailty

As humans, we have our unique strengths, and we also have our weaknesses. That is what makes us human. When I realized my weakness won’t make me live a perfect life, I had to accept my frailty and enjoy my imperfect state. This has helped me to gradually work on those areas that need to be improved upon.

The moment an individual fails to accepts his/her weakness, the ability to live a fulfilled life is drastically affected. We all make mistakes and these mistakes result from our imperfect states as humans. The first and most important step was accepting my weakness. It opened the door to my evolving into a better person and breaking free from the chain of perfectionism.

Work on your area of imperfection

While growing up, I was extremely shy. So shy that I had difficulty relating to the opposite sex. but when I accepted my frailty and imperfection, I started working on that major weakness.

It took years, but eventually, I evolved into a more confident and assured individual. It all started from the moment I accepted my frailty and the fact that chasing after perfectionism wasn’t doing me any good.

I joined the local choir in my church in a bid to improve my self-confidence and my phobia of imperfection. I also started attending some youth programs within Nigeria. These self-improvements and Information based classes created a platform for me to interact with other youths and also gave me the needed boost to become self-assured in my career pursuit.

It is not enough to accept your imperfection. Actively working to improve those areas where you need improvement is paramount. You don’t rejoice in been born into a poor family background. You work towards breaking the chain of poverty and liberating your generation yet unborn. I had to practically work on my imperfection.

Create room for tolerance

Another practical step I took in my bid to overcome perfectionism, was creating room for tolerance. In life, you will always come across different shades of people. The lazy, the hard-working, and even the perfectionist.

I have had my fair share of these, and when I created a mindset of tolerance from the onset, it enabled me to deal with the challenge of working with perfectionists. One thing you will notice about those who want to create an air of perfectionism around themselves is this: “They would tend to make all your effort or hard work seem inadequate”.

You can never please the perfectionist. They would always lookout for a fault in whatever you do. So the key was to create room for tolerance. Accept that you will encounter those who still believe in perfectionism. That room of tolerance you have created will enable you to deal with such a scenario when it arises. You don’t feel inadequate. You don’t feel insecure or victimized. You only learn valuable lessons from those who still cling to the dogma of perfectionism.

Improve daily

Though I don’t believe in perfectionism, I choose to improve on myself daily. This is a practical decision I started implementing more than a decade ago. I try to become a better version of myself. I don’t strive for perfection, because as humans, we can never be perfect.

There is always that element of condemning the efforts of others if we try to pretend or claim to be perfect because, in your eyes, you keep seeing the mistakes others make.

Improvement is both inward and outward. I strive daily to improve in areas where I know I am lacking. As a Content Writer, for example, I read books, watch videos on self-improvement, and try to implement these ideas in my daily life. Outwardly, I strive to improve my interpersonal relationship with others. Become more friendly, more helpful, and more accommodating.

It is a process, and just like a journey, been imperfect can sometimes be perfect, because it gives you room to be yourself and to learn daily. You don’t get to be too hard on yourself because you not perfect. These steps have made me appreciate life better and create sufficient room for those struggling to achieve their dreams and goals in life.

Every day

Make every day your best day

How do you feel about your life today?

Are you living every day in excitement?

Do you love what you are doing presently?

Are you looking forward to what is coming up next?

Are you living your best life?

If your answer to any of the above questions is a No, it means you are not living your life to the fullest. You deserve nothing but the best!!

Each day we wake up, what we have before us is a new opportunity, a blank slate that we can fill with whatever we choose. We are in total control of what we achieve each day. Do not be held back by what happened yesterday, the day before, the week before, the year before, or even decades ago rather, live in the present moments.

Do not spend your time trying to be someone that you are not. Work towards becoming who you want to be and stop living your life based on the ideas of other people. Start to take charge of your day and use every minute to better yourself.

There is no need to live a life that you’re not happy about. Nobody is going to get you to the life that you want. It is up to you to work for it and achieve it. It is high time you start living the life that you see every time you close your eyes.

 It is never too late to choose your dreams and achieve them. No matter how old you are, it is achievable, as long as you follow your dreams. Never be too comfortable living a life you never wanted.

No matter how bad you might have screwed things up in the past, no matter how far you have gotten from what you want to do, you can always turn things around. With a change of attitude, you can enjoy satisfying, wonderful, and beautiful days by making small changes in your daily life.

It all begins from the very moment you decide to make every day the best day of your life. It’s your life. It is possible to become what you ever dreamed to become in life. You are in charge and you have every right to live it to the fullest!

Ignore the haters

Ignore the haters

Someone once described haters as “people who whisper your success, but broadcast your failure”. They are always there no matter how you try to shake them off. Don’t even attempt to please them, because the more you do, the more they would keep hating on you.

Those who aren’t successful in life, don’t have issues with haters, because they are already down. The focus is always on those who aspire to achieve their dreams and goals in life. The more successful you are in life, the more the hate.

Eight years ago, when I bought my first call, not all my friends were happy with me. Some secretly envied me and with envy came hatred. It got worse when I started making real progress in my career.

How I dealt with haters

I focused on those who are happy to have me around and ignored the haters. This has worked quite well for me, because the more I ignore them, the quicker they disappeared. They realized that I wasn’t ready to take their hate seriously, and so they gave up hating on me.

Don’t get distracted

It is easier to get distracted when people say hurtful words about us. A young lady who was in an abusive relationship and had grown to hate herself shared her experience. “Each day was like hell on earth. I tried all I could to please him, but the more I did, the more he hated me. I felt I was not good enough. At a point, I had to break up with him, when the abuse was affecting me emotionally.

Those were the most difficult periods of my life. I became overweight, as I wasn’t watching my diet anymore. When I left Dave, I did all I could to gain back my confidence. It was a real struggle because I had almost lost everything. My self-worth was all gone. I had zero self-confidence and I was standing at the very edge of a mental breakdown.

Relocating to a new city and finding a new job gave me a fresh lease of life. It was like a heavy burden had been lifted off my fragile shoulder. For once I was getting my groove back and I loved it. The bad energy was all gone and I was able to make new friends.

Two years after, I fell in love with someone whom I refer to as my sunshine. He erased all the hate toxins that David had deposited in me. I realized that life always gives us a second chance to become who we truly want to become in life. Love triumphed over hate and I was the happiest soul that ever lived”

Never pay evil with evil

There is always the temptation to hate those who hate you. Unfortunately, that may not be the right approach. Like Martin Luther, King Jnr said: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that

We must always find a way to forgive those who hate without reason. Love them and always find a place in your heart to forgive them. Hopefully, they would see a reason to stop hating and start loving.

Get Inspired by hate

Some call them haters, but I would prefer to call them motivators. Let the actions of the few that hate you push you to greater heights. Keep using the stone of hate thrown at you, to build a platform that will inspire you towards your goals in life.

On the 14th of October 2019, Bulgaria hosted England in a Euro 2020 Qualifier. The match was almost marred with monkey chants each time England winger Raheem Sterling was on the ball. Raheem refused to allow racial abuse to weigh him down. It rather motivated him to put in his best performance in the color of England. He went ahead to score a brace, as England thumped Bulgaria 6-0.

Accessing Funds for small scale business

Accessing Funds for small scale business

Accessing funds for your business remains one of the biggest hurdles to cross when planning to launch your small or medium scale business. Some do say it takes courage to make your dreams come through. I agree to an extent, but let’s be honest. Without money, your courage will be stranded! Some dreams need not just courage, but money to become a reality! 

That’s why entrepreneurs lookout for initial start-up capital to kick start their dream business. To be honest, there are millions of people out there whose dreams of achieving financial freedom have become stagnant due to the lack of start-up capital. We all need the courage to pursue our dreams, but money is like a fuel to take our dreams to its place of destination!

One of the most difficult stages in turning your idea into a tangible business is that of funding. There are however several sources of funding one can explore and possibly utilize when starting up a business.

Your funds

It makes logical sense to start from home. If you are serious about starting up that business of yours, then you must have worked out a plan about saving up for the business. You can never rely on other sources of funding when you don’t have a dime saved up for the business.

The best bet is to open a savings account and start saving before launching your business. It takes a lot of guts and self-discipline to save up. Try to maintain a certain standard which will require you to save a minimum amount monthly.

Friends and Family

Friends and family are the nearest sources for funding your business. You must have saved a tangible amount of cash before approaching them with the proposal for funding. More than 80% of family and friends would want to know the type of business you plan to start and also how much you’ve been able to save up for the business.

Be ready to answer these and more of their questions. One major drawback with this option is the fact that family and friends may want to interfere with your running of the business when they eventually lend you some funds.

Angel Investors

Angel investors are more like business-minded individuals who look out for potential businesses they can plow their funds into. In return, they get a percentage of share in the business. They are usually involved in more than one business, so if you are looking for a huge capital to start up your business, angel investors may not be the best option for you.

Banks

Banks should be your last port of call. They are generally willing to give out loans as long as they can confirm your business has potential. Be ready to check up on the different banks to compare their loan conditions and the interest rate on the loan.

All banks have their conditions and rate when it comes to granting loan facilities to entrepreneurs. Remember, having a good idea is not enough. You must be able to come up with a workable business idea. These are the things that would be required from you when you approach any bank.

Print out a copy of your business plan and if possible have a slide ready for presentation. The business plan must be practicable because no bank will be willing to invest in any business that may not yield any return on investment.

Be Proud of Your personality

Be proud of who you are

Most of us spend a lot of time thinking about the things we have done wrong.  We keep remembering the mistakes we have made in life and how we have not achieved all the things that we want to achieve in life. We all have decisions we wish we could take back.

 Stop blaming yourself all the time for things you had no control over. It is human to make mistakes.  You don’t have to wait for someone else to pat you on the back for what you have done in your life. Always remind yourself of how incredible you are; be proud of being you!

One of the things which we don’t have control over is what others think about us. We live in a society that wants to tear everybody down often but none of us are perfect. Some people always want you to behave in a certain way or act a certain way. If you spend your time worrying about what others think about you, you will never be happy in life.

Never allow the opinion of others to destroy your self-confidence. Your dreams shouldn’t be based on the opinion of others. The opinion of others shouldn’t define your identity. What people think about you shouldn’t  cause any form of instability in your health, marriage, career, academics, relationship, business, etc.

Whatever they say about you is an opinion and nothing else. No one knows you better than you know yourself. No matter how hard you try, you are never going to be someone else so be proud of who you are and live your life.

The number of likes and comments you get on social media: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, WhatsApp, etc does not define who you are and how unique you are. Also, the number of followers or Facebook friends that you have will never define your value in life. Rather, you should be proud of what you’ve been able to accomplish so far. Be proud of the many more amazing things you are going to achieve.

Believe it or not, people will always judge and criticize you no matter what. So be criticized for being the person that you want to be in life, not the person that others want you to be. Be proud of who you are as a person by loving yourself and accepting your imperfection. Be excited about your past; not necessarily of everything you have done( we all have regrets), but of how you have kept going and working hard.

Be proud of every time you have failed. The fact that you have failed means one thing is certain: you have tried! Be happy that you had the guts to try in the first place. Be proud of all those times when you faced difficulties. Trust yourself with the decisions you take in life, focus on the positives, remove any form of negativity from your mind, and just be the person that you want to be.

No amount of approval from somebody else is worth dictating how you should live your life. You are worthy of living the best possible life. It is only one life that you will ever get. I love what Phil Mc Graw said:  “Instead of being ashamed of what you have been through, be proud of what you have overcome!”

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