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When death puts two lovebirds apart

When death puts two lovebirds apart

A Painful experience

Death of a loved one is one of the most painful experiences ever imagined. I could recall when I lost my Dad years back. It took me quite a while to recover from the pain and heartache. He loved me so dearly and always made sure I was happy.

What is even more touching is the sudden death of a spouse. Some find it so hard to deal with the trauma. More than 14 years ago, someone, I knew personally, died after a brief illness. He was so close to the wife. They were like Siamese twins.

The wife struggled to cope with the demise of her husband. Three weeks after the death of her best friend, she fell ill and died also. That’s how tough it is, dealing with the demise of a loved one.

I love poetry so much, and yesterday I saw a very emotional poem about the demise of a loved one. It is a touching tribute. Death indeed can create a vacuum that oftentimes, can never be filled.

If tomorrow starts without me

If tomorrow starts without me, and I’m not there to see. If the sun should rise and find your eyes All filled with tears for me. I wish so much you wouldn’t cry the way you did today. While thinking of the many things we didn’t get to say.

I know how much you love me, As much as I love you, and each time that you think of me, I know you’ll miss me too; But when tomorrow starts without me, Please try to understand, that an angel came and called my name, And took me by the hand.

And said my place was ready, in heaven far above, And that I’d have to leave behind all those I dearly love. But as I turned to walk away, A tear fell from my eye, For all my life, I’d always thought, I didn’t want to die.

I had so much to live for, So much left yet to do, it seemed almost impossible, that I was leaving you. I thought of all the yesterdays, the good ones and the bad, I thought of all that we had shared, and all the fun we had.

If I could relive yesterday, Just even for a while, I’d say good-bye and kiss you and maybe see you smile. But then I fully realized, that this could never be, for emptiness and memories, would take the place of me.

And when I thought of worldly things, I might miss come tomorrow, I thought of you, and when I did, my heart was filled with sorrow. But when I walked through heaven’s gates, I felt so much at home. When God looked down and smiled at me, From His great golden throne,

He said, “This is eternity and all I’ve promised you.” Today your life on earth is past, but here life starts anew. I promise no tomorrow, but today will always last, and since each day is the same way, there’s no longing for the past.

You have been so faithful, So trusting and so true. Though there were times you did some things, you knew you shouldn’t do. But you have been forgiven, and now, at last, you’re free. So won’t you come and take my hand, and share my life with me

So when tomorrow starts without me, don’t think we’re far apart, for every time you think of me, I’m right here, in your heart.”

Strength for the Journey

Death indeed separated two lovebirds and made what would have been a beautiful union end in tears. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, and though sometimes we are helpless, we do wish that we grow old with the one we love.

I once lost a very dear friend to the cold hand of death. I couldn’t believe he was gone until we all went to the morgue to see his corpse. It was an unforgettable experience. Death had dug a huge hollow in my heart.

Omoefe was always cheerful, kind, and gentle. Unfortunately, he fell ill and couldn’t recover. He was just 17. He was extremely talented and blessed with artistry gifts. Death ensured those gifts never so the light of the day.

To those who have lost a loved one, always take solace in the forever love that was shared. The beautiful memories will keep your heart glow and give you strength for the journey.

rejected thrice, he refused to give up

Rejected thrice, he never gave up on his dreams

Introduction

To be rejected and written off as not been good enough can be very devastating. Rejection comes in different shapes and sizes. Some rejections are minor, and may not pose any major hindrance to the individual progress in life. Unfortunately, some life-changing challenges come in the form of rejection. It takes a full dose of courage to recover from such rejection.

Susan Boyle

A talented songwriter and musical sensation Susan Boyle faced so many hurdles in the early stages of her beautiful career. She was once described as having a low Intelligent Quotient (IQ). She tried unsuccessfully to scale through several auditions, but she was never selected.

Her late mum however encouraged her to stay true to her dreams and give her dream one more push. She got inspired and entered for the 2008 edition of Britain’s Got Talent. That was the beginning of her amazing turnaround. Her rendition of “I dreamed a dream”, captivated the audience and over 10 million viewers that watched her perform. Her moment of success wiped away years of rejection.

Nwankwo Kanu was once rejected

Football Legend, Nwankwo Kanu was once rejected by national team selectors in  1991. At 1991 All African Games, he has decamped by then-coach James Peters because he was too skinny. Nigeria later won bronze. A year later he captained the football team to Atlanta 93. He never took his initial setback to heart but kept on improving his game. He later went on to win laurels for both club and country.

Victor Chiedozie Ojogho was rejected thrice

For  18 years old Victor Chiedozie, he faced rejection thrice. The first time was at a football camp. He shared his touching story: “It was in 2017, at the Abuja football college. I couldn’t make the team due to tribal sentiments. The coach said I wasn’t good enough. Two weeks after I left the academy, the players selected by the coach traveled to Italy for an FA Competition. I was a painful experience, but I had to move on

The Abia State-born footballer kept pushing on and never gave up. He was training so hard and just a few months later, another opportunity came. This time it was tagged “Tough  Season”. It was a football clinic held in Port Harcourt, Rivers State, Nigeria.

I traveled to the football clinic with my friend. We registered and started taking part in the drills and training sessions. When the list of selected players came out days later, my name was not there. Fortunately, my friend made the list and they traveled to Lagos,  for another 3 months camping. I did my best, but I never knew why I wasn’t selected”.

Another major setback Victor Chiedozie Ojogho experienced, came in 2018 when he was all set to travel to Europe for trials. Unfortunately, the entire plan was aborted when he couldn’t raise the funds for the trip (€3,000).

So often in life, some difficult roads do lead to beautiful destinations. Today, Victor has pitched his tent with Beautiful Strikers FC in Rivers State, Nigeria.  He’s still aiming higher even as he keeps training hard to achieve his dreams in life.

His dream is to play in Europe and make a success out of his career. Watching his high-intensity training sessions, and seeing the belief and determination on his face is a joy to behold.

Secret that kept him going

I couldn’t help but asked this passionate Chelsea supporter, the secret that has kept him going, despite these challenges.

Passion for the game. There’s something about passion that keeps you going. Sometimes you ask yourself if you can even play this game. So many players are better than you, but you keep pushing. 

You know this is who you are. You know this is what you want. You don’t allow anything to discourage you.  I have told myself, if I am ever going to get to the top, it’s by his grace and favor” 





Learning to tolerate someone's excesses is one of the toughest tests to handle. Some individuals can stretch your patience level, but you must learn to tolerate them.

Tolerate everyone that comes your way

Learn to accept people for who they are. You will always come across the good, the bad, and the not so nice. That shouldn’t stop you from being you. At my place of work, I’ve come across very nice people. They make my job look so easy. I’ve also come across people that are so difficult. They make my job look difficult.

 What do I usually do? 

I focus on the positives and ignore the negatives! That has been my source of inspiration daily. You can never choose who to like and who to hate. You have to learn to tolerate everyone that comes across your path in life. It may be tough to do, but when we see beyond their human frailty and become flexible enough to accommodate their weaknesses, it will be easy to tolerate them. 

It is only an unwise person that would expect to be loved and appreciated by everyone that comes across his/her path in life. The truth is, some will deliberately want to hurt you and see your reaction. On the other hand, some will go out of their way to support, inspire, and make you see things differently.

 It’s all about our willingness to have an open mind. There are always few bumps here and there, but we must keep striving and never look back in regrets. We must realize that we too are not perfect.

Benefits

Learning the act of tolerating others is a sign of maturity. A sign that we are growing up and letting go of yesterday’s pains and disappointments. There are three main reasons why we need to tolerate others:

1. It helps your inner peace:

 When you are unable to tolerate others, there is an absence of inner peace that develops over time. Their presence seems to irritate you and it can create anxiety and depression if not properly handled. 

2. Nobody is perfect and that includes you:

Everyone has their strength and weaknesses. As individuals, if we are sincere to ourselves, we’ll discover we too have our flaws. What that means is that when we come across people who aren’t nice to us, let’s see them as work in progress. An unfinished product that requires lots of patience and understanding to handle. 

3. We can’t love if we can’t tolerate others.

Love is one of the most amazing feelings in life. Apart from desiring to be loved, we must always look out for opportunities to shower love on others. They may not necessarily deserve it, but it helps to plant an amazing seed on their inside.

When people expect you to hate them and what they end up seeing his you showering them with love, it can change their attitude and help them become better persons. It’s not always about us. We can always find happiness when we share happiness with others. 

Seven Amazing Secrets Life Has Taught Me

Seven Amazing Secrets Life Has Taught Me

Life secrets are seen in the simple things of life. As I walked through the windy pathway of life, there are some hard lessons I have been forced to encounter directly or indirectly. These lessons have made me more mature, stronger, and better equipped to face the challenges of life. I am delighted to share them with readers, with the hope that it would be a source of encouragement and inspiration to those who are down.

Happiness is a decision

No matter what one goes through in life, always make up your mind to be happy. Happiness is a decision that starts from the inside and radiates outside. Never you give room for sorrow or sadness because life is too precious to be wasted. Life comes with sunshine and roses. It also comes with floods and pains. The most beautiful thing about life itself is the gift of life. Make a choice today to live a happy life and see how beautiful you’ll become.

There is no permanent friend

I have had the unique opportunity of meeting people I mistook to be friends. Shared all I had with them and in the end, all I got was betrayal and heartbreak. I have been made to learn this lesson the hard way because I took so many things for granted. Some individuals are friends who become friends based on interest. When things are rosy, they become so close. When things become rough, they enter into ghost mode and vanish into thin air.

Live each day at a time

One of the reasons why some individuals suffer from anxiety is the burden they carry on their lean shoulders. They keep thinking of what the future holds for them and add it to the problem of yesterday even when they are still struggling to make ends meet.

Life has taught me to live each day at a time, without worrying about what to eat, drink, or put on. Anxiety has not been known to have solved any problem. Live each day to the fullest and stop killing yourself with worry and anxiety.

Quality over quantity

When I got a hold of this wonderful secret earlier this year, the first thing I did was to cut off some unproductive friendship. These friends were not motivating me towards my goal in life, and I discovered that the more friends I had, the more complicated it was for me to achieve success in life.

The secret is in the quality of people you associate with, not the quantity. Two quality friends can help transform you from your present level into your dream life. Avoid mixing up with the crowd and identify quality friends who have similar goals and aspirations. This is the most precious secret I uncovered this year.

I can be anything that I set my mind to be

I have always loved writing and helping people achieve their dreams and aspiration. When I discovered these gifts were inside of me, the urge to work towards utilizing my full potential became apparent. Today, I am glad to announce that I have started seeing some of the fruits of my labor. I get emails and remarks about how positive my articles have blessed lives.  I’ve received messages that have left me in tears. It is like a dream come true.

I am exactly what I think I am

Whenever I am down, I daily confess positive affirmation to myself. Keep telling myself that I am a success not a failure. If I confess positive, my mindset will be programmed to accept positive thoughts and ideas. This will ultimately have a wonderful effect on my life. This is an ancient secret that can be positively or negatively activated. Your thoughts must be tuned to the right channel to receive positive ideas.

Don’t allow others to devalue you

You are too valuable and precious to be brushed aside. I cannot be intimidated by circumstances or individuals. The value I place on myself is what the world will appreciate and nobody can devalue or look down on me without my permission.

There is always a price tag attached to everything under the face of the earth. The price tag is determined by the owner of the product or goods. We must not allow anyone to take us for granted. You are priceless, inestimable in value, and beautiful!

Is happiness a choice?

Is happiness a choice?

Most times, we feel that when we set goals for ourselves, get our dream jobs, start earning more money, buy our dream house, be in a perfect relationship, get married,….. etc we automatically become happy. But we soon realize that achieving these goals doesn’t give us the happiness that we are craving for.

True lasting happiness is an inner state only you can give to yourself. You have to work towards your happiness the same way you work towards everything else in life. Happy people are not held hostage by their circumstances and do not seek for happiness in people or possessions.

The answer is Yes

Is Happiness a Choice? Quite frankly, the answer is YES! Knowing that happiness is a choice is not enough. By choosing to embrace happiness, you are taking responsibility for your satisfaction.

How then can you choose to be happy when someone has hurt you badly? When circumstances beyond your control are giving you so much pain? Are you doing the things you need to do to achieve happiness or are you letting your emotions take control of you?

If you are struggling to find the root of happiness, incorporate these strategies into your daily life in other to feel happier.

Determine what happiness means to you:

Just as Theodore Roosevelt said, “comparison is the thief of joy”. Comparing yourself with others will only result in unhappiness. Happiness can only come into your life when you love who you are and you are choosing to be the best you can be. Until you have attained that state of belief in you, living a happy life will be completely out of your reach.

Choose meaningful relationships / interactions:

According to Dan Buettner “the people you surround yourself with influence your behaviors, so choose friends who have healthy habits”. Surround yourself and interacts with the people who reflect the person you want to be.

Search for benefits in your pain:

At some point in our lives, we all go through pains and trials. No one can escape from it. Learn to remind yourself always that the trials will pass away. Rather, search deeply to find meaning and benefits within those pains and trials.

Understand how happiness works for you:

We all have different personalities in life. Some of us find it easier to be happy while others do not. Once this works out, then it becomes easier for you to identify what makes you happy.

Besides, happiness is not just a choice but also a daily practice that requires time, consistency, effort, and dedication. Since happiness is a choice, start finding things in your life that you are grateful for. According to Ralph Marson “happiness is a choice, not a result. Nothing will make you happy until you choose to be happy”

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